Jack Rabbit Slim

"Villain? Wow, man, that's pretty harsh. I'm just a guy who got bitten by a lab bunny."


AGI: d8 SMA: d8 SPI: d4 STR: d4 VIG: d6

Skills – Fighting d10; Investigation d6; Knowledge (Electrical Engineering) d4; Lockpicking d12; Notice d8+2; Repair d12; Stealth d12; Taunt d8

Edges: Super Power Points (5); First Strike; Quick; Luck

Hindrances: Cautious (minor); Pacifist (minor); Code of Honor (Robin Hood-esque); Yellow (he’s a bit of a coward)

Powers: Jack has all the physical (and some of the mental) characteristics of an adult jackrabbit including speed, great leaping ability, heightened senses, incredible reflexes, and one mean kick. He also has a pair of goggles that he designed to help him pick locks and break into security systems.


“You know the worst thing about being labeled a super villain, man? It really narrows your social circles. You’re pretty much stuck hanging out with only one type of dude. And they’re always saying stuff like, ’Let’s take over the world tonight’ or, ‘We should beat the hell out of that one vigilante.’ I mean, how about we just kick back and watch The Jeffersons for a change, man?
“And the second worst thing is how judgmental everybody is. I mean, villain? Wow, man, that’s pretty harsh. You don’t know me. You can’t see my heart. I’m not a bad dude. I’m just a guy who got bitten by a lab bunny.

“Basically, it all started with Betty, man. She was a total hottie with a body, and I had been trying to get in her pants for about two weeks before she convinced me to take a job doing data entry at GenetiCorp. It was a total setup, of course. Betty was way into PETA. I mean way into. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a vegan and all that (yeah, meat is murder; who’s the villain now?), but Betty took it to a whole new level.

“Her plan was for me to get in good with the lab staff and then release all the test rabbits first chance I got. It seemed kind of pointless to me, man. I mean, they were just going to get more rabbits, right? And after I got there it was pretty clear that the rabbits didn’t mind too much. I mean, they got treated pretty good outside of the odd injection. But whatever. Betty was rockin’, and I didn’t have anything better to do.

“It was no problem getting the gig. I mean, you might not know it to look at me, man, but I was only about a year away from getting my Masters in electrical engineering when I dropped out, so I was totally overqualified. I was only there a couple of days before I did the deed. I mean, security wasn’t exactly tight, man. They might have been worried about trade secrets, but they certainly weren’t worried about a mass bunny exodus. So everything was going according to plan until that last cage. I barely had the door open before that bunny was on me like a little tornado of fur, kicking legs, and snapping buck teeth. It sounds funny, I know, man. But it was a lot less Holy Grail and a lot more Watership Down, if you know what I mean.

“Little bastard bit me good. I hate violence, but I killed it anyway. It left me no choice, man. What if it attacked a little kid, or was some kind of radio-active bio-bomb, or, worse, bit me again? I stomped that vicious furball and got the hell out of there, grizzly trophy in hand. I’ve still got its foot. Been pretty lucky so far, although I guess it didn’t do him a hell of a lot of good. None of the other rabbits came with me. They just kinda hopped around on the floor. I don’t know if they were traumatized or just couldn’t be bothered. It was a stupid plan anyway. But I didn’t tell Betty that, or about how I killed a rabbit. Not until after I hit that. Yeah! Up top!

“I started getting my powers right away. After Betty kicked me out, I had to find a way to eat, man. People make such a big deal about me stealing, but I’ll tell you what: I never steal from people who don’t have plenty or who don’t deserve it. It’s called redistribution of the wealth, man. The rich have had it good for too long. It’s time to give someone else a shot. Besides, what was my other option? Go out and find a super-powered psychopath to kick in the face? No, thanks. I’ll take a pass on that.

“But now all of a sudden we got a new ruling class: aliens. Frickin’ aliens, man. Bourgeoisie from outer space. I’ll tell you what, man—it’s starting to make me think that maybe some folks do deserve a good kick to the face after all.”

Jack Rabbit Slim

Necessary Evil ICT radgnome chzbro